Surprise

Hmm! "Surprise! Surprise!" That sound always leaves my heart mumbling out a faint "ooh ooh". Now don't get me wrong, it's not like i dont like surprises, i looove surprises. Especially when i know that the bearer of the surprise is by my standard, a reasonable mind. As much as i love surprises, i do not welcome all of them. This is to say that depending on the person in question, a surprise may be good thing about to happen or a disaster waiting to happen.

Let me give you an instance. I just logged into this blog site; my blog site, i felt i could just mope at it and pity myself at the lack of creativity, just to notice that there has been an upgrade of some sort which doesnt particularly indicate what exactly you want to do. It used to be 'new post' for when you want to post something new and now what you get is just a pen symbol;an orange pen.*rolling eyes*. How the heck am i supposed to know what that's for if not that i had initially glanced at some psychobabble they were writing before finally accessing my blog. It's no more the usual colourful display you see but just an assemble of grey, white and orange colours. What an odd combination. To tell you the truth, this is one of the reason why i stopped logging onto Facebook.

Facebook in the person of Mark Zuckerberg is constanly reinventing itself . I never knew that reinvention could be so irritating until i noticed that i log unto Facebook at all times with grave apprehension wondering what will change. I wonder with each click whether i can still be able to locate 'Remove friend',for nut heads i want to wipe off my list or 'untag' myself from a totally disgusting picture or just delete some crappy comment on my post. With each surprise i got when i logged on, i reduced my visits, until presently, i hardly even log on anymore. That's how messed up a surprise can be.

Dude shows up and you are all smiles cause you can vouch for him and whatever he has in stock for you can't be that bad. Some other dude shows up and you have to restrain yourself from saying, "Can you keep it a while, cause as you can see, I'm kinda on my way out". That's how different surprises can go.

Anyway, there are few times i have ever been pleasantly surprised. I hope that if you are also in the shoes of those of us with phobia for surprises, this year will be different and we will all have a multiplication of pleasant surprises in my life this year. Who knows, i may even surprise myself. Will let you know. *wink* 

Dang! I'm running out of steam. Its been a better morning than it has been for a while. Would love it more if i weren't so cold. 

Have fun y'all...

A new love

Even writing the title of today is a hard one. I had to stare at it for a bit, before i moved on and really, that's what life is all about; a bit of a pause and then you are off, else what you end up doing is killing valuable time.

The year has been lacking in inspiration, but nothing inspires a writer more than a new love. Happiness or worry is bound to well up within you at the thought of someone other than yourself. But eventually, as time passes, you get comfortable, you fall asleep with 'him' in your thoughts and wake up with 'him' in your mind.

Sometimes we worry that an old love maybe the last love so we shut down and just drift through life moping around like there won't ever be a change. An old love, had its problems, when we let a new love in, is with care of the mistakes of the past, with caution and with our eyes open.

What am i raving about? I think i'm on the verge of another big love. Yes. I think i am because with each step i take i worry and worry until i am doing more of worrying than just loving the moment. So i say to my friend; Ada, "what's the worst that can happen?" She said ,"Heartbreak". I think to myself and i say to her, "Well, you know what?" "Heartbreak never killed anyone i know". I'll live, no matter what happens. I mean its not i'm suicidal, so why the heck not.*smiling sheepishly*.

So here i am, luxuriating that i am one of those few people who experience a big  love, twice in one lifetime.

I can confidently say to you, "wait for it". I never did nothing to get another chance, i dont know whether heartbreak lies in store for me, what i do know is that, "it won't kill me" and for the time i have it, i am going to love every moment of it.

So sitting on my boring table, i'm nodding happily to Kelly Clarksons song; "What doesnt kill you makes you stronger".

Its been a cold morning but i hardly feel the cold because of the pleasant warmth within me.

NO TITLE TODAY

Am getting angry all the time now and pissed off too. It's almost like i don't just want to know what is up around me anymore. You see, asides from the monthly pay check that comes in which is the only thing that makes it feel like i am an adult, nothing much is different. I don't think i have increased freedom at home, I got a query from my dad yesterday for wanting to go see a friend in broad day light. Imagine that! I am MISERABLE.

My misery makes me feel a vindictive need to make everyone's life just so; just like mine. I am selfish, yes i know. That's no news. You can ask my friend Ada, she'll tell u all about it. She never lets a day pass without telling me how thoroughly annoying i am.

Then there's the added fact that i feel like crap because everyone around me seems to either be getting married or planing to. It's not funny anymore. I mean, C'mon! Come on!! Where do friends from yester years get off being all grown up and getting married and having kids. Geez! Having kids. There are days when i hear news and it's not like am not happy for the chic, just that i feel an intense need to pull my hair out as i paste the fake smile on and say to my inner most self, "Why not me!" Just to have something going on for once.

Relationships have lost its charm. It's almost like psychobabble when some guy is trying to chat me up. Wake up already! People are getting married and you are wanting a relationship? Why the heck would i want that? Yeah, I said that. I mean, I've been there already right? So it's either i like you or i don't. No need for the hypocritical "lets-get-to-know-each-other" when he knows all he wants to do is get laid. I mean like seriously, let's be honest here.

At my stage, I shouldn't be looking for some sweet drawn out romance like way back in college. I should be looking at the bigger picture. You meet someone, you either like him enough to marry him or you don't. It's as simple as that. If it's more complex than i have already stated, then please enlighten me.

My 20's hasn't been all i hoped and dreamed it would be, i am seriously tempted to think it's worse than my teen years. Everything is so slow and achievements come in very limited and stingy bouts. I used to think that my 20's would be my "OH! so wow days!". Guess what? I was wrong,it's not, and i am so freaking disappointed. Freakingly so!!! I am mad, it's not fun, I am mad I'm still staying at home, I am mad all my friends live in various parts of the world and we hardly get together for a thing as simple as a drink. I am Mad! Mad! Mad!!! 

I guess the only swell thing about my life right now is that i shop when i want to and don't need to go a borrowing for it thank God. Asides that, my 20's have been a serious annoying bummer thus far. Asides from a few things i can tick off on one hand, nothing else has gone the way i want.

Let's just hope my luck changes soon, else i am going to drown you with my whinings and groanings. Oh! How i hate whiners! Does that mean i am going to hate me soon?

Life is so simple. Why the heck do people look for ways to complicate it every single time? Why am i getting probabilities instead of certainties? Why does it feel like i'm not that fly anymore? Why are there so many question marks around me right now. I need more of answers today, more of them, no more why's.

Thank God this day is over. This is officially that Monday when i wake up and just wish it wasn't a Monday and at the end of the day, i wish my wish came true...

  

Ashamed

As ashamed as i am to say this, truth is, i lost my inspiration. Hmm... There it is, out in the open. I finally said it and i didn't gag on it or drop dead. I actually feel better saying it or in this case, writing it. So let me do it again, "I lost my inspiration!!!" But do take note that the prior statement is in the past. At least i think so.

Since the last time i put pen to paper, a lot has happened. A lot that i have failed to put down, and so the moment was lost. I owe no apologies to anyone but to myself so i guess i can just give myself a pat on the back and go on like it was no big deal after all, like the ideas are still lying dormant somewhere and would be recovered. I don't know about that but we would see as the minutes rolls into hours and the hours gradually culminate in a whole day.

The weeks gone by have been fun. Yeah, it has been filled with various types of up and down moments but thankfully, i have remained on top. One thing i noticed during my time out however is that it seems like am having difficulty retaining as much as i used to way back when, i hope that won't go on for much longer though as i still have loads to achieve with this good head on my shoulders.lol.

I might not have that much to write today but, any writing is better than no writing at all. Someone said that, i just cant remember who.

Thanksgiving

This holiday has been great.


This holiday, my sister bought a purse for my cousin; lets say her name is X. She buys her stuff every holiday and gives it to her. X always collects these gift every holiday and comes back the next day with a complain.


This hols, my sister got X a denim purse. X got the purse but as usual forgot to say thank u right away. She just smiled and kept on looking at it. My sister I tell u wasn't too happy with this and made her grievance well known too me, too well if I might add.


X came to our house the next day as expected and said to my sister, 'Uzo, I like the purse you bought me, but when you're coming back next year, buy me a bag'. When my sis told me what happened, I was so furious, though we kept on laughing at her manifest ingratitude.


Am reflecting now, and it just hit me how like Anuli I am, how like Anuli most of us are. I just dint realise it, until now.


Now why would I say this? Well, you see, I'm a lucky chap. Always have been, always will be, you can ask my friends.*smug look*. Asides from very few unfortunate events in my life, I can say that I'm one of those people good things just happen to without stress. When I say good things, you are free to name it and of course you are free to doubt me but so far, I can categorically say, life has been good to me or is it the Universe or is it God?


Anyway, i have gotten so used to this unmerited fortune of mine, I barely pause to say thanks to God whom I suspect has made it so.


You see, I am not an overly religious person, but I know what should be and what shouldn't and when I hit d spiritual button, I practically drown God with my wants.


Yeah, I do. Am so ashamed to say it, but its true. Those times, my prayer would revolve around all that I want that would make my life more perfect than it already is and all that I think my family and my friends would want. My 'want prayer' could go on for minutes and run into an hour, hey, sometimes two hours ,yeah, seriously. When I get whatever I want, I just go on and ask for more and more and more.


Geez! I've been terrible. I see that now. Anuli made me see it.*sad face*


Its so difficult appreciating the source of a gift we get especially when we get gift(s) we haven't asked for.

Take a moment today and appreciate every single thing that you have that you never really asked for and then those that you have that you asked for.


Why u say? Well, let's just say, its a guarantee you'll get more.*insert big toothed grin*


You know why I say so? My sister has a kind and giving heart, and if only X had been more appreciative, she was sure to have gotten something fancier in the coming holiday. As it is, I don't think she's getting nothing. That I concluded from my sisters cunny laugh and colorful complaint moments after.


Well, I give thanks God I ain't like my sister, I'd have hit stagnant with my fine luck long time ago. But, hey God, I learnt my lesson. I really am more grateful than anyone can imagine for every little thing.

And let's hope X doesn't pay me an unannounced 'before-the-holiday' visit. That would mean a premature end to my rambings on this blog.


It's gonna be a great year. *dancing bogey.*

This new year

Its been a while I wrote anything. I know and for that, I apologize to no one in particular since I'm sure no one is reading my blog with that much interest yet.

Well, this new year certainly feels good. I feel like it bodes well for me in so many ways I just can't place a finger yet on what the euphoria is about but I'm sure that I would in due time. Of course I think I felt like this last year and all that but, I am a really optimistic person and just because last year didn't turn exactly the way I wanted doesn't mean I should stop hoping.

Moving on, I have a lot of hopes this year as I do every new year. Sometimes, I really wish I could just stop hoping for one thing or another but I just can't stop. A new year means i'm getting older and it never feels good when I think about it like that. So, I think about it in terms of, that i'm wiser, just that, nothing else.

And really, that's the truth. Since I haven't started feeling any major reflections of age, I like to believe that i'm much more wiser than I was in the past year and most times, I usually am.

Am still on holidays of course and loving every single moment of it. My only regret is that I have few days more left and I just don't want it to end. But hey, it has to.

So shake yourself up and know that there are only so much breaks in life. Some long, some short and at times, there are occasions where there are no breaks at all.

Let's hope that this year, when things get a bit rough cause it always will, we would be in the league of those, who get breaks, be it a long one or a short one. Let's hope not to be swamped so much that we can't get any break at all. Because the thing is, we need those breaks to keep us moving.

Hmm, looking at this now, I hope I don't sound odd asking that we take breaks so early in the year. If I do, well, odd is good. Isn't it? Well, err, sometimes...

Happy new year folks...

The Cheese in my Life.

There are few things in life that one really derives pleasure from and when i say pleasure, i don't mean what the general public views as pleasure. I mean, what an individual person views at pleasure.

For me, i like a good time. I like watching great movies, I love shopping, i love new items, ranging form clothes to shoes to jewellery and the best of all, perfumes. Nothing makes me feel good like a fabulously scented perfume. Not the kind that triggers off my allergies, thank you,just the really cool stuff.

Am sure by now, you must be wondering what the title of today's blog has to do with what am ranting about. Yeah, well, am wondering the same thing too. I seem to have forgotten.*wrinkling forehead in seriousness*. Okay, yeah i get it now.

You see, the "likes" i have previously mentioned only happens on  days on which i own myself, like weekends, public holidays, sick days, you know, weak stuff like that. On the other days, I'm owned by another establishment. Yeah, somebody owns me that is not my parents or a spouse or a child, imagine that? So on these other days which is like every other day of my life asides from the ones already mentioned, what i like to do within the space of an hour is talk, laugh or eat and then laugh again, that is of course when i find the time. Laughing is a drug to me, it keeps my soul intact.

Still on my likes is the realisation that I love my colleagues. Frankly, i never thought i would ever say that. It just came to me on one of my sick days that i actually did miss them! Imagine that! I kept on pinging Okey. Okey is a colleague of mine by the way, i was trying to know the details of what was happening at each time of the day. It was a surprising discovery for me. I actually did miss them.

Okay, fine, I didn't miss all of them, neither do i love all of them, but the ones i do love are more significant anyways. The best part of our love is when we talk about our bosses. Yeah, i said it! We talk about our bosses. I'm definitely sure that is relatively common, although of course no one i know is ever really bold enough to say it out loud, even me. That am blogging about it right now doesn't mean that i am going to say a word about it if i am called up to do so. But everyone of us does that at one time or the other, at least that's what i think. I think it helps relieve stress because after much detail being recounted, you will find some details that would make you roar out will laughter and ones that will stay with you all day causing you to smile intermittently.

This is not a professional assessment anyway, all i know is that a good laugh helps me relieve whatever stress am under at the time and so i enjoy it whenever i can, be it chatting about events of the day, a friend's aunt, a new boo, an old love or a boss's mannerism. Lol. Of course I'm not going to go into details of all we talk about but just so you know, it is a guarantee that on such days, i am sure to have a good laugh.

What i am trying to say and i ope succeeding at saying is that, a good laugh is sure to relieve stress even after a most hectic day. You'd be amazed at how much comic relief your bosses are, i  know i was and still is. So, laugh a little everyone. It's a great remedy to so many things.

And just in case any of my bosses ever ever reads this, it has been marked and stamped, "WITHOUT PREJUDICE" somewhere at the back.

It's been a great day.